June 4, 2012

• The breakup was inevitable

  A couple years ago I wrote a blog entry about one of my oldest and dearest friends. (On my Kallioph account.)

  Later, I wrote an entry here about her marriage and the lack of respect her husband gave her.

  She finally had enough and left him.  Theirs was one of the rockiest marriages I have ever seen.  But one thing I knew for sure, he was a narcissist.  His entire world revolved around himself.  He would only engage in conversation if he and his greatness was the subject being discussed.  He had no respect for others, seeing himself as superior.  Therefore, he had no respect for his wife.

  Here are the latest examples:

  In April, Sheri and I were involved in a chorus competition.  We took first place in our division.  When we walked off the stage, Roger was there waiting for me, but Sheri’s husband was off somewhere talking on the phone to someone he worked with many years ago discussing the building they were in and how he was the designer of the walls (he works in architecture.)  He spent 45 minutes on the phone, and didn’t even come out to the lobby to look for his wife.  Needless to say, she was pissed off and hurt.  She saw how Roger grabbed me, hugged me and congratulated us on our win.  He was proud of us.  I think that is something she has never experienced from her husband – pride in any of her accomplishments.

  Last fall, we took a trip together to Chicago.  He is not supposed to be drinking for many different reasons.  He bought a half gallon bottle of scotch and spent most of the weekend in a drunken stupor.  He almost got into a fight with someone on the street, and tried befriending some of the homeless that walk the streets late at night.  The last night we were there, the concierge called her room and told her that her husband was found by police passed out on the sidewalk and they had him in an ambulance.  She went down to get him – totally embarrassed and devastated by his behavior.  He was missing a gold bracelet.  He was still drunk at 9am when we went to leave the hotel to drive home.  He was loud and obnoxious in the hotel hallway.

  More recently, Sheri had to retire because of a disability.  The company threw a retirement banquet for all the people who were retiring this year.  David went with her, but because she was one of the guests of honor, he was bored, and spent most of the time sulking because he wanted to be somewhere (anywhere) else.

  So when she told me she had left him, I wasn’t surprised.  In fact, I was almost relieved.

  I’m not going to offer her any advice (unless she asks for it.)  But I am here for her. 

  • 10:15 am
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